“Love is absolute, unconditional acceptance. You either love someone or you don’t. There is no in-between.” -JN
My thoughts: True, but you can love someone and still leave if they are damaging mentally, emotionally or physically to you or others around you. Love the person; deny the behaviors that are damaging. If the person won’t let go of those behaviors, then let go of the person. It’s called “Tough Love“. And yes, itfrikkin hurts, but you can’t “save” them; they MUST save themselves. To think you can “save” them or “change” them is not love, it’s selfish; do you love them simply because they are unhealthy and you “can save” them? If/when they do decide to change, you can’t decide how they change, either; are you sure you’re ready to accept whatever changes they make? If you stay with them when they’re toxic, abusive and/or damaging, it’s because you are getting something out of that damaging relationship you don’t want to let go of. What will you have when that relationship is gone because they finally changed?
Loving someone unconditionally does NOT mean you’ll let them treat you & others like shit and just take whatever damage they cause & pretend it doesn’t exist or is nothing. It means that you will forgive them unconditionally for their mistakes when they stop making them, and will help them learn to not make them. It means that you love them enough to respect yourself and your own health, as well as theirs, and not let them continue to damage your life, even if to prevent them from doing that means removing yourself from theirs until they are ready to give an honest attempt at change for the better. It means you respectthem enough to accept that you cannot make or force them to change, andmust let them decide to make those changes themselves, and you can onlyguide them or help support their decision to change for the better.