I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, sitting here in my room over the last week while barely able to move from the virtigo from the T3s. Feeling pretty damn lonely & wishing someone would come visit me, to be honest. I spent a lot of time playing video games, as simple text chatting just made me feel lonlier; it all too often feels sterile, artificial and fake. I crave real people, real interpersonal interactions. There’s only so much comfort one can get from typing “/hug”; it’s nowhere near as comforting as a real hug.
I was reminicing of times when I was younger; when I was in elementary school, people would come visit my mom for an hour or two here & there, and especially durring the summer my mom would have visitors almost every day, or we’d drive over to visit someone else for an hour or so. Short little jaunts, but they were fairly regular & much more often than I experience with people these days. Most of the times these visits were after school or on weekends, of course, but I remember them fondly and wonder why, since I’ve moved out on my own, I haven’t had that same sense of slcialization I had looked forward to when I was a kid.
Then it hit me; often these visits happened when we drove over to see these people, or when they drove over to see us. I looked back in my memory and, from what I can remember, when we did have to travel by city transit, the visits were rarer and would be more like half-day trips.
Visiting someone these days seems to require a purpose – going for a few hours for video games or a LAN party, going to study for the next exam, going to discuss the kids’ extra curricular activities, so-and-so is having a party at her place so we’re gonna get wasted/high/pre-drink then go to the bar… etc. etc. Few to no people I know just go visit any more. Even when they go for coffee, more often than not it’s only for “a few minutes”.
With the frantic pace and seeming “high-cost-of-living to low-pay-cheque” ratio of todays lifestyle, is it really harder for people to have those casual social calls, especially without a vehicle of one’s own? Are we so busy trying to excel & surpass those around us that we’ve forgotten the importance of meeting for coffee as often as we used to? Has the rising cost of transportation made such socialization stupidly impractical any more? Sadly, I am beginning to think the answer to all these is “Yes”. People I know seem to socialize less often unless it’s for a large party, just going over for a casual visit to someone’s home happens less and less. And with so many people living on so many sides of town due to not enough income for gas or cars etc, and the city bus system here being in such a sad state, visiting a friend becomes a day trip rarely done because of so many other little obligations that taking an entire day off is hugely impractical. Often, visits are done if the people happen to be doing errands in the same part of town only.
So I’m sitting here, wondering what I can do about any of this. Maybe I should initiate more visits like this myself. Wait, that isn’t possible… I have no car, and my current income doesn’t support one, AND I suffer the same issues with the bus turning things into “day-trips”. Sadly, I suspect there’s nothing I CAN do until I AM able to improve my income and/or employment. So, for now, I sit here in my room, much of my life circling in a holding pattern.
But this won’t last forever. ^_^